I’ve been through some very difficult situations in my life. Each one has taught me a different lesson. Each moment of adversity has made me a stronger person. That being said, here I am, close to midnight, sitting in my Father’s room watching him breath….
I’m completely tired of watching him struggle and suffer. I am so over him being sick. I find myself asking God, “What’s Up? Is he gonna get better, are you just gonna make him go through this suffering!?” I’m glad God never rejects me when I yell at him. I’ve found myself these past 2 weeks having an out loud verbal discussion with my God, my Lord.
I hate this moment in time, I hate this current affliction. It’s barely bearable…. but, greater is He that is in me, than he that is in this world. I want to take Dad fishing, I want to load him up and head to the keys, but here we are, in his room, stuck as if there’s no end in sight. Truth be told, I look forward to the end of all pain and suffering. I look forward to the day when Jesus kicks satan in his teeth and cast him into hell…. So, here I am, waiting and wanting to have this end and looking forward to God making all things new.
Hospice Day #4